How to be Clever

I am a moderately intelligent person. Oh, who are we kidding? I'm a freaking genius.

I learn quickly and I know how to apply knowledge. I seek solutions that others don't see. I can learn how to do almost anything by research and experience. I am good at everything I decide to attempt to be good at. I can remember bits and pieces of my life from when I was two. I paint, carve, write, draw, build, design, know computers in and out, tile, refinish, restore, and beautify. You can call me egotistical if you want. I am and I'm not.

The problem is...anyone can do this. I'm not that special when you boil it down. I just do things that naturally exercise your brain. I've always done them and didn't know till recently that they were part of why I learn quickly. I am going to share a few of my tricks with you. I want you all to be geniuses. I think the world would be better off if there were more people who think and are aware.

Trick One: Smell things. The first time I went to the doctor after I learned to speak, I told him that his stethoscope smelled funny. I remember when I was three and my sister spilled kerosene in the basement. I could taste it and I can still picture the high backed wicker chair next to the puddle.

I catch myself sniffing things sometimes. I apparently do it without thought. I sniff my sandwich at the deli before I take a bite. I sniff a brand new pen, blue tooth head set, leather strap of my watch, the herb I just picked from the garden, or a chunk of sandstone I found on the trail.

Your sense of smell is directly tied to your memory. It also forms connections to places. Your brain creates maps constantly. You can visualize your home in detail, but can you smell your home? Your brain creates maps around all your senses. We use sight so much that we forget that our other senses do this too. You have a scent map, a texture map, and a sound map in that melon too. They are interconnected, but we lean on our sight too much. Use all your senses and your brain makes more pathways, more connections, makes you smarter.

Trick Two: Close your eyes. Visualize the world around you without using sight. This forces you to lean on your other senses. Once again, more pathways, more connections, smarter. Many of us do this briefly when we shut off the lights at night and make our way to bed by touch. Try more. Close your eyes in the shower. Work your way through the routine by touch alone. Close your eyes as you unlock your front door. Choose the right key, put it in the lock, turn it, open the door, make your way inside. Close your eyes while you eat breakfast. This reaffirms the neural map in your head and improves your spacial awareness.

When I was a kid I used to lay on my bed and spiral my mind outwards. I would imagine the bed, the bedroom, the trunk in the corner, the dresser, the house, the neighborhood, the state, the county, the world, space, the solar system, the universe. It is good to know where you are. You will find your spatial memory improves. Someone will mention an object and you will picture it in your mind and know exactly where it is, even if you saw it only for a moment days ago. You will also be less likely to run your cart into someone at the grocery store. This will make me very happy. I always get annoyed at everyone's lack of spacial awareness at the grocery store.

Trick Three: Laugh. I'm not sure if there is documented science linking laughter and intelligence, but there should be. My brain just feels better when I laugh...less squishy and mushy. Humorous jokes last longer in your memory. You will always remember the look on someone's face that made you crack up. Laugh more and you will learn more. Look for things to laugh about. Don't mope. I laugh at myself a lot.

Trick Four: Never stop learning. We have this glorious thing called the internet. It is not all goofy cartoons about unicorns, light saber weirdos, and porn. It is a gateway to knowledge. Don't know how to tile...look it up. Don't know why ants walk in lines...look it up. Don't know why space time is curved, why the sky is blue but sunsets are red, how skin heals, how fusion works, why solar panels make electricity, how chocolate is made, why raindrops are shaped that way, how many licks does it take to get to the center...look it freaking up! Never stop. Ever. Learning is a part of the human experience. When we stop learning we die.

That is about it. I could offer more tricks, but most of them you know. Read. Do puzzles. Brush your teeth with your other hand now and again. Mix it up. Have fun. Learn. Grow. Be. I expect you all to be geniuses by tomorrow. Get to work already.