This post is brought to you by my little sister, Michelle Berry. She is almost as goofy as I am. She wanted to share a story so others could learn from her misfortune. Pay attention. This is valuable stuff. Some minor editing and cartoons were done by me, but she gets credit for the story.
I wanted to tell you about one of my life lessons. This story is full of foreshadowing, but, as I was in the midst of it, I couldn't see those glaring clues.
A couple months ago I went to a nice Christmas Boutique with my mom. There was a cute little boy there who growled at me. Those of you who know two year old little boys also know that they love to play the growling game.
What is the growling game? Are some of you unaware of this great toddler invention? Well, it is when an adult (me) and a child battle our growling prowess back and forth until the loser forfeits. Either the little boy gets bored and goes away or I get annoyed that a two year old is beating me and I storm off. In fact, my favorite past time with my nephew, Wubzilla, is the growling game.
Is it cruel of little Wubzilla's parents to nick name him that? Perhaps, but you would understand if you saw him. He is a blond haired blue eyed sumo wrestler in a two year old's body. He even does the legs shoulder width apart stomping thing that sumo's do. His parents call it his happy dance.
However this story is not about Wubzilla, but this little boy at the Boutique. There were huge clue's that the growling game was not such a good idea with this little boy. I ignored those clues, but will point them out to you as I go. Hindsight and all. Do not make my mistake!
1st. Clue: We were at a fancy Boutique where the ladies were dressed in designer clothing, wearing fancy jewelry and bedazzled purses. This boy was wearing a diaper. That's it. No socks, no shoes, nothing but a very distressed looking diaper.
2nd. Clue: This little boy was no pleasantly plump Wubz. He was a lean mean growling machine. I'm even tempted to say he was Rambo's illegitimate love child.
3rd Clue: When it was Rambo babies turn he added a very aggressive scratching/clawing motion to accentuate his growling.
So, after a few minutes of the growling game, Rambo boy charges toward me.
I, still oblivious to the danger, think "Aww, how cute he wants to give me a hug." He did hug me for about two seconds.
Then he proceeded to bite my right butt cheek HARD!
Maybe I should have noticed the evil glint in his eyes, but I am naive and paid the price with perfect little kid teeth marks on my right cheek and a bruise that lasted a week.
So, life lesson learned. DO NOT play the growling game with strange little boys!
